Month: March 2024

Howl, Again

Or whimper into the dead of night, late, when everyone is sound asleep, or should be sleeping, when I should be sleeping, but how, when visions of destruction dance like shrapnel in my head, images of little girls, their fathers reaching up under their skirts, traumas too sad to hear, to see, like young men forced to fight in wars that have no end, that should never have begun, blown to pieces, holding pieces of themselves together with duct tape and baling wire, hoping to see their mothers once again, hoping they won’t come apart before it’s too late, before they can make it home again, when home is taken by somebody else, when home is under a bridge, too much money for anyone to afford, to stagger, to gasp, to scream and run away, into the mountains if we’re lucky, where the wind blows savagely and wild animals hunt us, but better to be hunted by the wolves than by other men, giving and taking blows, never ending, demanding, lying and taking, taking, taking all that might have been sacred, breaking through the doors of  our churches with fabulous tales, promises of safety, secular fantasies that replace ancient orthodoxies, progressive delusions that supplant traditions beloved for millennia, a farewell to trust and faith, capitulating to a fear that hides within masks, pretenses of love and harmony, parading like neighbor’s, like Christians, betraying, Christians, each other, themselves, betraying, betrayal, the seeds of terror, of night-sweats, of nowhere to turn, nowhere to trust, nowhere to believe, our sacred institutions prostituted, prostituting, despicable and filthy, beauty corrupted by betrayal, this is the stuff of nightmares, dead-ends, sorrows and loneliness. I remember the beautiful places where we gathered together, apart from the world, where we worshipped and made our home, home away from home, sojourning in hope of a more perfect future, before confusion, coercion, good intentions and hell disguised within cloaks of light bastardized our communion, how can we not wail now, even years later, after so many years of deceit, lying to ourselves and each other, believing the lies, telling the lies and consuming them like an unholy Eucharist, peeling our masks down to taste the sacred through deceptive teeth, tongues that lap up treachery and deception, breathing the holy air through N-95s, self-satisfied, primitive, raising the banner of our tribe, proving our allegiance, our loyalty to the world, trampling on the still small voice that whispers truth into our ears. Howl at the loss of everything we loved, the betrayal of whole societies, peoples, families, congregations turning their backs on one other and on what once was, which is no more, and cannot be regained, never found, lost forever, until death do us part, and we are restored in darkness, into a different world.

~FS

Jesus

His tender eyes spoke,

To man, as to a little child,

In the dawning of the morning,

So fair and clear and bright.

Bathed in sunlight,

Walking on new-born earth,

With chubby feet washed clean,

With eyes gazing straight and true.

Not turning away~

Either from the glare,

Or from the shadow,

But seeing it all,

While He watched over.

Yet as the sun climbed higher,

Men gave their eyes to others,

Gazing as through clouded eyes.

With trust in trust misplaced,

And with love of love erased~

With words of blooming sweetness,

Loyal to their dim heart’s weakness.

Until Spirit intervened,

Interceding our salvation,

Mediating revelation,

Through a nativity reborn.

A mother of clear vision,

He raised our eyes to His,

And lit the heart on fire,

And spoke again the Word,

That freed us from each other.

~FS